My grandmother is in the hospital.
She is elderly and frail and her body has begun to succumb to her age.
It is hard to think she is fading a bit each day but so much harder to see it through the eyes of her son, my dad.
I hear it in his voice when we talk, the tug of sadness in his words.
When we hang up the phone I am always left wishing I could do more.
But no matter what I do, the situation is still the same and I can’t lessen his growing sadness.
We drove down to visit yesterday. Leery of parading my noisy troops through the hospital, we met my dad in the lobby.
As he stepped off the elevator, the kids let loose from my grip and shouts of “Papa!” echoed from the walls.
My dad’s grandchildren ran to him with arms wide open, crossing the length of the hospital lobby, shouting his name.
I watched him bend down and brace himself as his arms filled with my babies.
They hugged him tighter, longer than usual, as the smile came back into his eyes.
He turned towards the open hallway, happier than I had seen him in days,
hanging on to all I have to give.
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I'm Jessica, 30-something mom to five, four in my arms and one in my heart.
So sorry to hear that your grandmother is not doing well
I pray for comfort for you and all your family.
Stephanie recently posted..Making a choice
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Thanks so much Stephanie.
Sorry to hear about your grandmother. But glad that your kids could bring a smile to your dad. Sending hugs to you!
christine recently posted..Love is Never Wrong
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I’m so glad I can bring a smile from my kids, they also created their own rock band a few hours later at my parents house. Nothing like a little deafening music to make you feel better.
Your words, and your heart are so stunning.
{I’m so very sorry that your Grandmother is sick.}
Galit Breen recently posted..Wear Purple, Do Right
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Thank you Galit, hard to watch the family go through this.
I have been there. Sending you tons of hugs and love to you and your dad.
Sili recently posted..Monday Musings: Choosing
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Thank you so much.
My heart goes out to your family. I watched my grandmother take her last breath while holding my dad and aunt’s hands. My dad is not a man of emotion. He held strong until he saw my girls the next day. They too ran to him with open arms yelling “Papa” just as your children did and that is when he broke…in a good way. Their honest, pure love let him release some of the sadness and helped bring a smile to his face.
Kristen recently posted..A Bad Day at The Salon…
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That is exactly how my dad is, he doesn’t get emotional, until it comes to his grandkids.
This made me sob. My grandma is still at her house, but there are many similarities to our situation. I know my kids cheer my dad up in a way nothing else does lately.
I’ll be keeping your grandma (and dad) in my thoughts.
Twitter: angelaamman
It really is amazing what our kids can do for their grandparents isn’t it? I always knew my kids made them happy but watching that moment made me realize just how much.
So sorry to hear your grandmother is ill. I’ll be keeping her and your family in my thoughts.
Kimberly recently posted..My Workout, Pregnancy Style
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Thank you Kim.
hugs my friend.
Sara @ PeriwinklePapi recently posted..(Re)think Breast Cancer
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Thanks so much Sara.
Having lost my mother on New Years Eve, I can totally relate to what your father is going through. My prayers are with you all.
Angel recently posted..TTUT: Healing and life goes on..
I can’t imagine how difficult that must be Angel, thank you so much for your thoughts.
Hugs to you my friend. And even though he doesn’t know me, tell your Dad he’s in my thoughts (and the thoughts of countless other bloggers, too). I am so glad that he has the love of his grandchildren to help lift his spirits.
I don’t know if reading the words of others who have been through the same thing help him, but if they do, here’s my post about getting ready to say goodbye to my Dad: http://www.squashedmom.com/2010/03/nearly-finished-business.html And the one about time spent at the hospital, waiting for my mother-in-law to pass: http://www.squashedmom.com/2010/09/sitting-here-in-limbo.html
Varda (SquashedMom) recently posted..Monday Listicles: 10 Things I Said I’d Never Do
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Thank you so much Varda, I will share it with him as well as your sweet thoughts.
I am so sorry that your Grandma is ill. That bond of grandparent/grandchild is so sacred – just like you’ve told us here.
Love you,
Tracy
P.S. I love a beard on a dad. My dad has one too.
tracy@sellabitmum recently posted..What I Wore Wednesday – Shopping with Mommy
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My dad has always had a beard, I remember him shaving it off once and it scared me to death. He grew it right back.
I’m so, so sorry, Jessica! I’m sure this is such a difficult time for you and your family.
liz recently posted..Damn You Autocorrect, BBCD-style
This: “as his arms filled with my babies” makes my heart full. My babies are so lucky to have the grandparents that they do – I couldn’t have hand picked better ones.
I am so sorry that you and your family are going through this. My paternal grandmother was (one of) the most influential figures in my life and one day (too soon) she will no longer be here.
I don’t know what I will do without her, I don’t know who I will be without her, but what I do know is that she will always open her arms wide so that my babies can fill them.
Maija @ Maija’s Mommy Moments recently posted..An Open Letter to My Step Mother
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This made me cry because my mom is going through a hard time right now and it’s like on some level my kids know. They run to her and hug her and shower her will love and kisses. She says they know just what to give her when she is feeling her worst.
Oh the love of a child is such an amazing thing.
Jen recently posted..Un-Child Proofing
I completely agree, we spent the whole day with them after that and the kids seemed to need my dad more than usual, one of them was always tagging along behind him and asking him to play… just what he needed. Hope things get better for your mom soon, she is in my thoughts.
I have to say, this is beautiful Jessica.And yes, there is nothing more important in a grandparents life than their grandchildren.It is a the greatest love I have ever experienced. You want to protect them from everything, and they give such unending joy, and trust you toally to fix everything.. I think it is something everyone should experience. That amazing wonderful love between grandchildren and grandparents.
Oh, how tough this must be for all of you. My thoughts are with you. I’m glad your dad has a reason to smile through it all.
Mrs. Jen B recently posted..Wellness Wednesday: Slipping Up & Righting Myself
–Wonderful Photo.
Sending love from Minnesota. X
My Inner Chick recently posted..Who Rocked And Rolled At The Golden Globes
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Sending love and my thoughts. I hope you can spend some quality time with your family.
love
Diana x
Diana Doyle recently posted..Forever Four…..another year gone by
Kids have an amazing way of reaching down into our souls when we need them. They truly save us in times of darkness.
I’m praying for your family and sending much love and strength during this difficult time.
xoxo
Kimberly recently posted..I’m A Pretty Big Thing In H-Town
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I am thinking about you and your family with love. xoxo
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I will be praying for you and your family. Hugs.
Jessica recently posted..Sisters
My heart aches to read this. There is so much beauty along with the sadness.
Lady Jennie recently posted..Prayer. And Humor.
This post really touched me. I am so sorry to hear about your Grandmother, and I am praying for your family. That is the hardest thing to go through, as I have watched my Mother go through it with my Paw Paw. So glad you could bring some joy to your Dad,even if just for the moment during such a tough time. Thank you for commenting on my post, and I am so glad I found your amazing blog. It means so much that you are going to take that step to protect your children by securing that dresser. You know sometimes the lighter pieces of furniture still do massive damage. The dresser that fell on Brooke was not all that heavy:) Hugs to you and I will be praying for your family during this difficult time, Laurie
Thank you so much for stopping by to visit Laurie and for all of your kind words.
Oohhh..my heart. Thinking of you and your family my friend. I know that I love the smiles that my children bring lots of my family….sometimes I am just grateful for their pure existance..the fact that we got them here…and they are a joy for my family. I saw that in your words….thinking of you.xo
Kir recently posted..Capturing 4
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Sometimes hugging a child and holding our loved ones helps the sadness.
Leighann recently posted..Can You See Love?
We were just visiting my 99 year old grandfather and you captured exactly how I feel. Thank you. Take care.
Lanie recently posted..The Good News & the Bad News
It’s so hard to see someone suffer; and it’s just as hard to see such sadness in your own parents. Thinking of you guys!
Melissa recently posted..I Hope They Know
I’m so sorry! I know how hard it is. I lost my grandfather a couple years ago…my Mom still has a hard time with him being gone on special days.
Teresa (Embracing the Spectrum) recently posted..Denial. And Why I Can’t Get My $h*t Together.
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It must be so tough for your family, I am sorry to hear this, my heart is with you! Children. They can cheer you up in any kind of situations, how lucky you all are, to have each other in these hard days.
Anna recently posted..Do you let your dentist treat a tooth unless it hurts?
I’m so sorry about your grandma. But glad that your children can make your dad so happy.
Shell recently posted..Pour Your Heart Out: Crying Over Burnt Eggs
Oh, so sorry to hear about your grandmother. I hope she’s going to be OK. Mine means the world to me. She’s the most special lady I’ve ever met. Thinking of you.
Ali
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Your words are so beautiful. I’m sorry to hear about your grandma, it has to be a tough time for everyone. I’m so glad that your children brought the light into your dad’s heart when he needed it the most.
Barbara recently posted..Pure Joy
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Sending you love Jessica. Kids seriously are the most amazing little things – always knowing exactly when we need them the most xxo
Devan @ Accustomed Chaos recently posted..The Importance of Catching Those Fleeting Moments
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So sorry to hear this. Sending you lots and lots of love. xo
Rachel {at} Mommy Needs a Vacation recently posted..General Food + Wine Pairing Guide ~ Free Printable!
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Thanks so much Rachel.
By the time I met my wife, I had lost all of my grandparents . . . and soon after she & I got married, she lost her last one.
Grandparents are so, incredibly, wonderful. I really, really wish my kids could have met mine.
*hugs*
While the end is always hard, it does sound like she knows that she’s well-loved, which is all I hope for, myself, when the time comes.
John recently posted..Where I write about strippers, and Spongebob, and free beer
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Completely agree, living a full life and knowing you are loved is all we can ask for.
Hugs to you and your Dad. My Nan is in the hospital right now too, and it’s freaking hard. It’s so nice that your Dad has his grandkids to cheer him up and put a smile on his face.
Andrea @ The Penny-Roach’s recently posted..Memories Captured – January
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So sorry your Nan is in the hospital as well, I hope things get better soon.
I vividly remember my 8-month old nephew crawling down the hallway of my grandfather’s assisted living home, where we held a small reception after his funeral – Marlow was crawling toward his mom and laughing this crazy maniacal laugh that none of us had ever heard before and it completely CRACKED us up. And there, among all the sadness surrounding my granddad’s death, my parents, my brother, and I stood and genuinely, even joyfully, laughed. Children just seem to have that effect – they shine their light on even the bleakest situations.
My thoughts are with your grandmother. I’m so sorry she’s not doing well.
Kristin @ What She Said recently posted..Blogus Interruptus
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I couldn’t have said it better Kristin, amazing the light that kids can shine onto a difficult situation.
I could so clearly picture that moment because my son is the same way with my dad. It’s hard living 5600 miles away, but they light up when they get to Skype with him. Praying for your family!
Courtney Kirkland recently posted..52 Faces | Week Three
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I love that our kids can do this for our parents must be tough to be that far away.
I know that our children can bring such joy to people when they are hurting. My grandmother passed a few weeks after Donut was born. I remember feeling incredibly sad and lonely as I rocked her alone in my house, too far away and too icy to be with my family. I think we all took a special comfort in the new life of my baby girl to cheer us on.
Rach (DonutsMama) recently posted..Oh, I Would Never…
Wow, dealing with such a loss right after a birth had to have been so difficult but at the same time I’m sure your new baby helped you through it.
This is so special. Both of my grandfathers were excellent, delightful even, with little kids. Such a shame they both passed before I had a baby. I find relationships like this so special. And your words are so beautiful.
Jen Has A Pen recently posted..Blow Me, Bagel Boy.
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I feel the same about my grandpas, neither of them met my little ones and I can only imagine how much they would have loved them.
It always amazes me how the twinkle of life in a childs eyes and smile can be the perfect reminder that joy is still available and hope hangs on. Wishing you joy and hope in the tough moments now and ahead.
Twitter: Perspectparent
I feel the same way. Thank you so much.
I am so sorry! How wonderful that your children made his day brighter!
JDaniel4s Mom recently posted..Read.Explore.Learn.- An Orange in January
I’m so sorry to hear. I feel the pain, as I lost my father’s mother a week after my dads tragic death, his father a year later, and my only grandmother is currently ailing. I, too, watched my dad struggle with his fathers stroke before my dads death and it’s crushing when you have no power to take the hurt away. Sounds, though, like your children do that for him even if it’s just for a moment before he remembers the hurt of his ailing mother… it’s those moments that count! *Hugs*
The Anecdotal Baby recently posted..Have Boobs, Will Travel
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My thoughts and prayers are with your nana. But what a sweet post this is. Love the picture of your father and son. Beautiful XOXOXO
Charlotte recently posted..Approval
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Just think, you were leery of even bringing them. I’m sure that was the best part of his whole day. You shouldn’t think that you can’t do anything for him, look what you did this day. My dad passed a year ago. He too was Papa. Reading this makes me miss him so much. I’m so sorry you are going through this.
I’m so sorry you lost your dad Traci, I can’t even imagine.
Thanks, it does suck. It’s so nice that your dad has you(and your kids) to help get him through these tough days. I’m sure he loves when you come by.
So so beautiful. I needed this today- thank you. Yes, your day was perfect.
Emmy recently posted..Craft Time: Love Sign
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And woah, sorry that comment appeared on the wrong post! I thought I was writing it under the princess post! Sorry
Emmy recently posted..Craft Time: Love Sign
Twitter: Emmymom2
Hugs Jessica.
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