The past few weeks have been full of forms… school registration, medical history, emergency cards… all the fill in the blanks that come with the beginning of a new school year.
By form #4,385, it dawns on me how often I check the “other” box. How many times we don’t fit into the choices listed and I have to spend a bit more time explaining a circumstance that does not fit neatly into any category.
I have to say I don’t enjoy writing more, I would much rather be clicking away at a laptop once the kids are in bed or watching reality television with wine in hand. I’m actually thinking of creating a few custom stamps to make the task less monumental. Maybe “she has autism but she also has a great smile and the kindest of hearts” or “if you call them twins we will switch schools faster than you can ring the school bell” and of course, “he is potty trained, sort of.”
“Other” used to be the place I dreaded most. It took me years to be comfortable in this box, outside all of the others. There are still days I wish things were easier or different or tied with a pretty pink bow but ultimately, they are not. And you know what? No one’s life is. If the forms were longer, if their were questions that asked about the true history behind each of us we would all have an “other” weaved somewhere along our path.
My household, planted firmly in the “other” box, is shaped by what makes us different and we might as well embrace it. Part of our story, maybe the most important part, is accepting what life has handed us and showing the world we are much more than what they see on paper or tantrum-ing through the grocery store aisles.
Our stories, yours, mine, the woman who just cut you off on the freeway’s have been molded by years of experiences, the good, the bad and the oh-my-gosh-how-am-I-still-standing. Take a minute today to embrace part of your life that you wish were different. It is part of you, a piece you might not have chosen if you had seen it typed neatly into your life, but part of your story none-the-less.
Maybe that’s why they make us use ink on all those annoying forms.
If you can’t erase it you might as well embrace it. (Hmm, maybe my new family motto???)
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A little exciting news that I am finally able to announce… I am now a writer at Childswork, a fabulous site that offers every resource under the sun for special needs families. Would love for you to visit me at my new home away from home and follow them on Facebook too, you won’t want to miss all the exciting things they have planned!
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I'm Jessica, 30-something mom to five, four in my arms and one in my heart.
Congratulations on the new gig
This is beautifully written. I like your stamps idea, but you are so right that there are many “other” boxes that each of us would check if different questions were asked.
angela recently posted..Brushing Them Off
You always have such a beautiful and unique perspective on things. xo
Alison recently posted..Best Photo Bomb Ever By A Toddler
Yes – it can’t be erased… but can be embraced. Beautifully put.
It’s always been “other” for me.
Jenni Chiu recently posted..Stop judging me as a mother, Me.
Twitter: MommyNaniBooboo
I actually thought of you when I wrote this and how, meeting you and not having read your blog often, I had no idea about the story that you carry with you. I used to often feel like I was the only one with a child with autism, the only one who lost a baby, etc., etc, but we all have a story.
Congratulations on the new writing job! That’s awesome!
My family is also in the “other” group and I’m okay with it… it’s who we are.
Jackie recently posted..Cute shirts & a Great Cause
Congratulations on your new gig! Totally deserved.
And you’re so right. We all have an “other” in our lives whether we realize it or acknowledge it.
Courtney Kirkland recently posted..Motherhood Robbed me of my Social Skills
Twitter: CourtneyKirklnd
With four kids previously in Catholic school, I spent years listing my name under “Mother” on their school forms. After awhile, I just laughed at it.
I feel your pain. Well, sorta!
m.
Mark recently posted..Pride
Twitter: Rsimplelives
You know I had never thought about that and I’m so glad that you brought it up. I have decided those forms should just say parent.
The beginning of school does seem to involve a lot more paperwork than I thought was possible. Other sounds good. I will work on embracing what I cannot erase.
Congratulations on the new writing job! xoxo
Lanie recently posted..Very Inspiring Blogger Award
Yeah, I so get this. From one “other” mother to another: Love you so much in all your otherness, babe.
Varda (SquashedMom) recently posted..Full Circles
Twitter: SquashedMom
Love this and I hear your strength in every word.
Oh yes, I definitely have an “other” here too. I love your perspective on this.
Congratulations on the new gig!
Kimberly recently posted..Essence Of Now
I needed to hear this today. I don’t know why I’m always wanting to fit into a cookie cutter. Or put my family in one.
Congrats on such an awesome job! Sounds like a dream
hilljean recently posted..10 Reasons Summer Needs To Be Over
Lovely post. I always dread the emergency cards and having to reevaluate each year who are the people I can list to show up in my place if I can’t be reached.
Congratulations on the new writing job! That’s wonderful news.
Korinthia Klein recently posted..The Amazing Milwaukee Race on Bikes!
I like that attitude Jessica. “It we can’t erase it we might as well embrace it.”
Congratulations on the new job.
L.McG.-E. recently posted..Daydream.
Twitter: LMcGE
Such an inspirational motto! I really like the picture as well, I think I have just found my new wallpaper:) By the way, I know hoe stressed these days can be, I have got two little boys who have just started the school, it is still a lot of things to get done, andI have now idea how to manage it on my own…
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Congratulations on your new writing job! It sounds like such an amazing opportunity! I love the idea of embracing the “other”!
Barbara recently posted..WTF Wednesday – Canine edition
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Congrats on the new writing gig!
Corey Feldman recently posted..Part 2 – Egret and Red: the later years
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Life is beautiful, no mater where the check mark lands us… and truth be told, probably the only option should be “other”…. because each of our stories are precious.
Beautiful post.
Aleta recently posted..11w6d ultrasound
Congrats on your new gig at Chidswork
My Inner Chick recently posted..Incident at the Grocery Store
Twitter: krrobi
Thanks so much!
I can only imagine how this must feel…to always be explaining the “other.”
I mean, my kids generally DO “fit” one of the categories; and yet I still want people to know more about them than simply what the box implies.
I don’t want the school’s knowledge of my child to consist only of the fact that they have NO allergies NO medicines NO conditions that need assistance. They are still special and unique and need assistance…just not in ways I can explain by checking no…
So once again, you’ve made me think about something that hadn’t crossed my mind before.
(This is only part of your magic; part of what makes YOU an “other.”)
p.s. Congratulations on your well-deserved new position.
julie gardner recently posted..Today call me proud. Or cornered. Or just read my post.
Thank you so much Julie, I will take that magical “other” compliment and hold onto it tightly. xo
Beautiful. You are a graceful writer and I love your embrace of “other”. “Other” is always the most interesting part of all of us. Looking forward to reading more of your work. You have a wonderful and unique voice.
Bethany recently posted..Out of the Mouths of Babes
Twitter: BPMbadassmama
Thank you so much Bethany, I appreciate you taking the time to read.
from one “other” mother to another…. xo
congrats on your new gig!
anna see recently posted..She’s Calling Him Lobbie
Twitter: aninchofgray
Love that motto.
Congratulations on your new writing space
I like your new motto, and yes it suits you.
Lady Jennie recently posted..A Sunset Near Bordeaux
You, my friend are an inspiration! Truly, what an amazing attitude you carry. xoxo
P.S. Congrats on the new gig!! Are you still at SheKnows too?
Tonya recently posted..Where I Write To My Dearly Departed Self
Twitter: letters4lucas
I actually ordered custom address labels that I had printed with all of Leah’s “other” info. Saved me a whole lot of hand cramps! Now I just stick it over the “other” box and move on!
Kate recently posted..3 Weeks Have Dragged By and No Appointment