I have a confession to make.
Lately my five year-old, always the considerate one, has been bringing me my phone if he sees it laying around the house, because he knows it is usually in my hand.
Too often I set my kids up with a fancy shmancy craft and the minute they are all fully engaged in art work I give myself permission to check Facebook or run to the computer just for a second.
If my lap is full of little people on the couch I am usually straining my neck to the side, catching up on Words with Friends or Instagram or email.
I always start off with the best of intentions but I don’t end that way. I end paying attention to everything at once which is ultimately nothing.
You won’t find a radical vow to give up social media or hide my phone from myself in this post. Writing is how I breathe and my stay-at-home-mom sanity depends on staying connected to my friends, even if it’s through a quick text or a status update.
But I’m going to quit being everywhere at once. I don’t want my kids to remember me with my phone in my hand all day long, I want to focus on just being wherever I am.
I’m going to finish our art project until someone wastes the last of the glue and I’m really going to build a Lego tower even if I can’t help but stack the colors in a pattern and I am going to really, really look at my kids when they talk to me.
I never make New Year’s resolutions so I will not call this a resolution, just a promise to work on changing this year. (Yes I am very aware this IS the definition of a resolution.)
There are all these things I really want to do but there are also all these little people who I really want to remember and who I want to remember me. Not as the mom at the computer or the phone but as the mom sitting on the floor or at the kitchen table. I have countless years to come with hours that belong to me but I have a feeling my days of glue on the table and Legos on the floor won’t be nearly as many.
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