I remember, about a month or so after we got married, Mark and I went out to dinner with friends who had been married for years. When dinner was over we headed to the car hand in hand and I asked Mark if he had noticed that they never held hands.
I never want that to be us, I told him. I was head-over-heals in love and wanted him to hold my hand every moment it was empty for the rest of our lives.
That was over five years ago and I think we held hands once this month, when we were by ourselves for twenty glorious minutes.
But today, and everyday, I love him just as much as I did that day in the car.
I love him the same and different and more.
Because when I do the laundry I find hair bows and pacifiers in pockets where golf tees used to be,
because he can turn “Every Rose Has Its Thorn” into a mean lullaby,
because his idea of a crazy Saturday night is laughing together as our kids streak through the house, diapers and pj’s flying,
and because, I have learned, there is a lot more to marriage than holding hands and gazing into each others eyes.
There is laughter and tears and laundry and grocery shopping and more-than-full-time jobs and sick kids at night and sleeping with little elbows in your ribs and more moments of wonderful and heartbreak than I can count, and it is all worth it.
Because there is someone at your side through it all, whether they can reach your hand or not.
I know that some day we will have empty hands to hold and I will find golf tees where hair bows once were and “Every Rose Has Its Thorn” will be reclaimed by its rightful owner and, I would imagine, there won’t be quite as much streaking on our Saturday nights, but I will love my husband the same and different and more,
all over again.
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There can certainly continue to be streaking on Saturday nights years from now. As a matter of face, I recommend it! ;-P LOL!!!
This is sweet. And so true. 🙂
Speechless.
I love the hand-holding, too. And I absolutely adore teh repetition of the “it’s same, it’s different, it’s more” in this piece. You have a way of writing that always tugs at my heart strings. I only hope to have this kind of marriage one day, too. 🙂
I remember thinking I could never love my husband any more than I did yet 16 years later I love him so much more. He has been there through the laughter and the tears. Many say the loss of a child could destroy marriages my husband made sure it didn’t destroy ours. Even when I hated the world he loved me more.
http://serwisbankowy.info/
My partner and I have never really been hand holders, but I used to say the same thing when I saw couples who weren't constantly chatting to each other. Now, after 10 years together, I understand that one of the nicest things about being in a long-term relationship is that you can sit together in comfortable silence, and just enjoy being together – especially when you have kids at home and rarely get some peace and quiet!!!! x
Beautiful and well-said.
You've hit it right on the head there. I can't even remember the last time I held my husbands hand. But I know it will be there for me, whenever we find the time
So lovely and so true.
This choked me up. Its a beautiful reminder that just because we don't hold hands and get all mushy over dinners out it doesn't mean our marriage isn't strong, it means its stronger, different and growing. I loved it and haven't ever been as effected by a post as this one! WONDERFUL!!!
Wow, Leighann, thank you for such a wonderful comment. I have wanted to take the time to sit down and write about my relationship with my husband for so long and I am glad that I finally did.
Beautiful! Simply beautiful.
Thank you Trish.
maybe someday the saturday night streaking won't be done by the kids. try to enjoy every minutes with your kids. before you know it, they'll be all grown up.
I am enjoying it, thanks for the reminder Traci!
Love love love this post. Xoxo
Absolutely beautiful post! 🙂
Aww…simply a lovely post. So true how the love changes but also deepens. You captured it perfectly 🙂
I hope he read this.
I love this post! it brought me to tears… The picture at the end is precious! Amy
What a sweet post and an even sweeter daddy!
It's just romance in a different way!
Such a sweet post. Romance changes with kids, but it's still there.
Great post! It's very true – it is all much more than holding hands.
Loving your hubs the same and different and more <— I TOTALLY get that!! And I adore that photo. ADORE.
Beautiful. It's so easy to let the day to day get in the way of remembering why you're together in the first place.
I love this even more the second time around 😉 Came over again from TRDC weekend linkup.
This is lovely 🙂 We don't hold hands often right now, they are just full with the children, but the day will come when we can do it all the time 🙂 I left a shout out for you for a meme/award over at mine for you, a little bit of fun 🙂 Jen
Thank you Jen, off to claim my award… Happy Monday.
Well if that isn't just perfect I don't know what is
You ar submitting this blogher for syndication, yea?
You just make my Monday. Read Old Tweeners last night and was just thinking that one of these days I would love to create a Blogher-worthy post.
Well, I'm glad it made you happy. Now go email this to syndication, stat!
Also, please excuse my typos as I often read and comment on your blog from my phone. I've got fat thumbs, I guess.
Very nice. Congrats on another year!
The whole end to the streaking thing…I wouldn't count on it. Sometimes i think the only reason the Hubs wears clothes is because we have kids. Otherwise he would be Naked Guy. Thank God for the kiddos'! 🙂
Lol, I would be in a bit of trouble if I told you whether or not my husband would be Naked Guy once the kids are grown since I think he was already uncomfortable with me getting all mushy over him here. Thanks for reading and glad for you the kids are keeping Naked Guy at bay.
It must be time for bed because this made me weepy! Lol! So sweet and insightful.
Sorry to make you weepy, hope you slept well after the tears!
So funny, my husband always wants to hold hands. And I am not always a hand holding person (half related to the hugging thing, but my hands are often sweaty so I am always self-conscious). And he will randomly tell me that I should want to hold his hand and I tell him that whether or not I hold his hand has nothing to do with how much I love him. Sometimes I just want my hands!
That is funny, I think we have all graduated to the point where we need or want our hands, whether they are sweaty or not.
Love this post. Puts it all back into perspective….thanks.
Glad you liked it, thanks for reading, Christy. Hope you guys are doing well.
I love this post. Wonderful as always.
Thanks Sarah, you are supportive as always!