By Jessica Watson

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Kind

By Jessica

I still struggle with my decision to let Ashlyn be manager of the girls’ high school soccer team.

I pick her up every afternoon from practice, still holding my breath a bit, hoping that practice went well and that the girls were kind.

Kind and teenager girls do not normally go together.

After practice the other day Ashlyn informed me that she had started working out with the girls.

My heart caught.

Autism and poor coordination and difficulty with gross motor tasks and the possibility that her participation caused an extra stare or two, sent that tingling nervous feeling traveling up my chest.

I began quizzing her on the workout, hoping to spy any bit of ridicule through her retelling of the events, my mind already spinning as to how we would handle this one.  Should I talk to the coach?  Should we work on educating the girls a bit more on autism?  Should I even let her return?

And then she got to the part about running laps.

I even ran with the girls, Mom.  They finished way before me and then they were all staring at me while I ran.

There it was.

I felt my face burning a deep shade of red, hoping the steam coming out of my ears was not visible, I asked, they were staring at you?

Yep, they all ran on the side of the track, cheering for me until I got to the finish line.

My heart caught again but with pride this time and overwhelming relief.

She was in the right place.

In an effort to wrap up any lingering doubts and throw them right out my minivan window, she finished.

I have more friends than I’ve ever had in my whole life, Mom.

My teenager has found kind.

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35 Comments Filed Under: Autism, Musings of Motherhood


Comments

  1. Amy @ Never-True Tal says

    March 2, 2011 at 12:16 pm

    So glad I read this today. You've restored my faith in teenage kindness, at least for today!

    Reply
  2. Amanda G. says

    March 2, 2011 at 10:24 am

    That is beautiful!

    Reply
  3. JallieDaddy says

    March 2, 2011 at 8:54 am

    Not a word I use a lot, being a bit old (fashioned) & well, British, but: Awesome!

    Reply
  4. Branson Merrill says

    March 2, 2011 at 12:55 am

    This warms my heart! I have found a wealth of kind teenagers in my adult life… don't know where they were all hiding when I was in school! 😉 So excited for Ashlyn!

    Reply
  5. QWERTY Mum says

    March 1, 2011 at 12:43 pm

    that certainly made me smile 🙂
    visiting from blog gems

    Reply
  6. Mad Woman behind the says

    March 1, 2011 at 12:26 pm

    Oh yeah, tears of joy bursting from my eyes. How absolutely wonderful and what a huge relief. And I'm with the Empress. Absolutely make a big fat public acknowledgement of the teen girls kindness!

    Reply
  7. Jaime says

    March 1, 2011 at 11:28 am

    Oh goodness…totally crying! So sweet 🙂 I'm so happy for Ashyln!

    Reply
  8. MommaKiss says

    March 1, 2011 at 10:23 am

    Seriously impressed with the kindness you find sometimes. Because I know the awfulness of teenagers. I'm so glad your girl is enjoying it.

    Reply
  9. Miri says

    March 1, 2011 at 9:04 am

    Oh I am so happy for her!

    Reply
  10. Alexandra says

    March 1, 2011 at 8:55 am

    Thank you, for sharing the good, not just the bad.

    Reading so much bad, it can weigh you down.

    The girls on the team need this printed out and given to their adult manager. She needs to read this aloud to them….kids don't hear ENOUGH about the good they do. I'd also go all crazy and over do it and print this out AND mail it to each parent, or send it home with each girl, for each parent.

    I know I'd read it out loud at the dinner table, so the siblings of these girls, could see the ripples, the far reaching ripples of kindness.

    AND THEN, b/c I am known to be nuts: I'd send this to the editor of the local paper to print in the edit page.

    There, work done. The world needs to hear more about GOOD.

    Reply
  11. Kathleen says

    March 1, 2011 at 7:25 am

    What a wonderful and lovely story..:) Sometimes the world surprises us doesn't it? Good for your daughter..such a great experience will make trying new things easier. Over from blog gems..

    Reply
  12. Erin Branscom says

    March 1, 2011 at 5:04 am

    I just found your blog and I love it! 🙂 I am your newest follower! 🙂

    Reply
  13. Jayme says

    February 28, 2011 at 11:13 pm

    That is beautiful! I am so happy for her!

    Reply
  14. jillsmo says

    February 28, 2011 at 10:48 pm

    I love it!!!

    Reply
  15. AmyOConnor says

    February 28, 2011 at 10:30 pm

    This so just made my heart melt!!

    Reply
  16. Heather says

    February 28, 2011 at 10:22 pm

    Hooray for Ashlynn and Kind girls on the basketball team. I'm so happy for her!

    Reply
  17. Mrs. Jen B says

    February 28, 2011 at 9:58 pm

    Oh, this is so beautiful. I am so happy for her! And for you, for knowing that she's in a good place.

    Reply
  18. Sarah Halstead says

    February 28, 2011 at 9:57 pm

    That is so awesome. I am so happy for her and you! How amazing!

    Reply
  19. Laura says

    February 28, 2011 at 8:43 pm

    (tug) this post got me. I know how horrible teenage girls can be- but what a blessing that your daughter has some amazing ones in her life. I sure hope it continues. This is a testament to what is good in the world. Thank you for the uplifting post. Needed it on this day.
    Hugs-
    L

    Reply
  20. Jdaniel4smom says

    February 28, 2011 at 7:50 pm

    I am so happy for her. Teenage years can be so tough. Sounds like she has a great group to hang with.

    Reply
  21. blueviolet says

    February 28, 2011 at 5:31 pm

    What a true blessing! I was scared right along with you! So happy!!!!

    Reply
  22. Anonymous says

    February 28, 2011 at 2:45 pm

    This made me teary. It's wonderful to know that there are KIND and wonderful kids out there!!! YAY for your little girl finding them and inspiring them to be kind.

    Reply
  23. Leigh Ann says

    February 28, 2011 at 11:16 am

    This is so touching! What a great experience for her. You know, we have to give teenagers more credit sometimes. I remember being in the athletic department, and we had some students with disabilities that acted as managers. I don't remember anyone being mean to them at all. Teenagers can be cruel, but most still have a sense of decency on who is really not ok to pick on. And the kids in the athletic programs are often some of the most well rounded and accepting. So glad she's having fun with this and making friends.

    Reply
  24. Anonymous says

    February 28, 2011 at 11:13 am

    This is wonderful. Thank goodness for fun with friends and no mocking.

    Reply
  25. Amanda Yussman says

    February 28, 2011 at 10:40 am

    This post brought tears to my eyes. How wonderful, for her and for you as her mom. We need to be reminded that there is still kindness in the world. I hope those girls on the team know how much their actions are appreciated.

    Reply
  26. Sugar Mama says

    February 28, 2011 at 9:36 am

    As soon as I read the line "they were all cheering for me" I lost it. What an amazing thing for your daughter to experience and what a GREAT group of girls she gets to be a part of. Very encouraging!

    Reply
  27. Crystal says

    February 28, 2011 at 9:20 am

    brings tears to my eyes <3

    Reply
  28. By Word of Mouth Mus says

    February 28, 2011 at 9:17 am

    Oh, I felt that relief flood through your body.
    We talk about being kind here very single day.
    Kindness overcomes all, there is no room for anything else when you are focused on just being kind
    … such a simple idea 🙂

    Reply
  29. Asia says

    February 28, 2011 at 8:39 am

    Wow, this is great! I wish I could feel that way when I was younger. I think "kind" was something that did not happen in my life. I was mistreated by my peers a lot.

    Reply
  30. Kelly says

    February 28, 2011 at 8:36 am

    Oh my. This. Is. Awesome.

    Thank you so much for sharing this. It gives me a glimmer of hope for acceptance and tolerance for my boys.

    Reply
  31. Finding MyNew Normal says

    February 28, 2011 at 8:05 am

    This post makes me so happy.

    Reply
  32. Anonymous says

    February 28, 2011 at 7:47 am

    This gives me hope for this generation. Sounds like your daughters friends were raised with respect and dignity and the belief that everyone deserves the same…

    Reply
  33. Kristen says

    February 28, 2011 at 7:39 am

    I hope this is all she ever knows. What a wonderful bunch of girls she is with…OR…your daughter brings out the best in the people she is around…OR…BOTH! Kudos to the girls for their kindness and kudos to your daughter for trying something new. Doing a cartwheel for you. Hope you are feeling better 🙂

    Reply
  34. Lynn MacDonald says

    February 28, 2011 at 7:38 am

    This! Is heartwarming….love it!

    Reply
  35. GalitBreen says

    February 28, 2011 at 7:04 am

    Chills. I literally have chills. This was a perfect post. Kindness is an absolute MUST. And you're right: Not everyone has it down. Thank goodness that those surrounding your girl right now DO.

    Reply

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