My feet pound the path.
I weave my latest in a long line of must-have baby-mobiles through the curved path, rows of pine bend at the waist, bidding us past.
My husband, he strides, love and purpose in every step. Oh, he is stopping again, a shoelace undone or a coveted sticker has floated off. The dutiful task of herding 3 foot wanderers, all his.
I maintain our pace, aware of the purpose I carry, comfortable as the leader, but only here, only in purpose.
My oldest skips to my side, can I fix her ponytail while we walk? Of course. I contemplate guiding the stroller with my teeth.
I am all powerful today.
Feet tap out a heartbeat behind me.
Their eyes fall on my back, the message carved and sharp.
Once in a while, I drift behind and they flow ahead. I see theirs too.
Etched with a name we chose, a span of dates, they nod at me, a wink of strength and hope.
Gratitude pours sweet tears.
We near the end, put tiny feet to the ground.
They tap out the last of the journey, it is theirs.
It is hers.
It is ours.
This post was written in response to the Red Dress Club Prompt:
When meeting someone for the first time, describing a scene from your life that would help show the person your true self.
When I sat down to write this I had no idea what scene I would use. I started typing and this is what came out. It is me. Many thanks to our amazing friends and family who walk with us or donate each year, in Hadley’s memory and in honor of all of our preemies.
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So beautiful!!! So strong! Thank you for sharing this!
Mad Woman behind the Blog says
Loved this! I immediately felt like I was walking beside you and your little family, feeling the companionship, the joy, the familiness of the moment.
Thank you for giving us this peek into your world.
I knew what you were walking. and it started right then. and I loved listening to your thoughts and your tender descriptions of the mundane, within the larger purpose.
thank you for writing this.
You certainly are all powerful. You are strength, my friend
Leigh Ann (The Twin Spin) says
Jessica this is a gorgeous piece! It reads like a beautiful dream. March for Babies is one of the things I most look forward to each and every year, and we’ll definitely be thinking of you and your family this year since I’ve gotten to “know” you.
By Word of Mouth Musings says
Had to let you know that I was here, but you know that I will be always be here ….
I do know, I definitely do. Thank you.
I feel, from reading your posts, that I’m already getting to know you, but I love this scene for so much. The children orbiting you, your constant awareness of your husband, the way you experience your surroundings… it’s all simply and beautifully rendered.
I’m so honored to have found you and this wonderful space you’ve created. As far as introductions go, you could do no better.
Amy a/k/a HonestConvoGal says
Lyrical, poignant, lovely. Very well done.
Charise @ I Thought I Knew Mama says
Beautiful post and picture! You’re an amazing woman.
Amy Hillis says
aw, you made me cry – beautiful writing, as usual. An inspiration, to be sure.
Cheryl @ Mommypants says
Truly lovely and sad and inspiring. Thank you for sharing such an important moment.
Beautiful post!!! Such a much needed cause to bring attention to. Well written Mama!
This is beautiful….and so very sad, but uplifting at the same time. How does that even make sense? But in your case, I think it just does.
Your writing just keeps getting better and better, although I wouldn’t have thought that was possible. Great job.
This gave me the chills…beautifully written.
What a beautiful post. Sad, but so powerful.
No one should have to walk for this purpose.
This was so affecting. I felt myself walking with u, hearing and seeing what u saw.
I love this and the picture only adds to your powerful message. Well done.
I love it when I sit down and think I have nothing to say and something like this just flows out of me. That is a great feeling!
I love reading your feelings.
You make me see you better.
Many hugs your way, powerful lady.
My favorite line:
“My oldest skips to my side, can I fix her ponytail while we walk? Of course. I contemplate guiding the stroller with my teeth.”
Because I actually pictured you doing it! And I loved that no matter the occasion, life and love lives in the tiniest details and actions of our lives.
Thank you for letting us walk with you for just a moment. You are beautiful.
Galit Breen says
This is so beautiful, strong, inspiring. I only wish? That it wasn’t so. Great post. Truly.
Denelle @CaitsConcepts says
This is just beautiful.. so many emotions in such a short piece, much like the span of emotions during those times, I’m sure. You are truly inspiring.
I just don’t know what to say here.
I love the wave of emotions that comes through the post. The verbal walk to counter the visual one in my head.
And I’m sorry that you’re walking for the reason you’re walking.
I love how you allow yourself to experience all the emotions from your daughters short journey in this world; the joy, the pain, the gratitude, the grief, the inspiration, and the remembrance.
She left her mark.
“I contemplate guiding the stroller with my teeth.” I’ve done that too! We are amazingly strong, us mothers. You strength shines through here. xo
Victoria KP says
Your posts always get to me. So beautiful to be able to find strength after such a loss.
So beautiful- just like you! 🙂
Elena @NaynaDub says
I agree with Sarah’s comment – you always amaze me! Does your family organize this walk? I’d like to come – if possible!
We do the March of Dimes March for Babies every year at Kensington. We have a big team of friends and family and would LOVE to see you there!!!
I really enjoyed this.
The words say so much; the picture says it all.
Oh hon, this is so beautiful and so perfect. xoxo
That is powerful. All of it – the walk, the attitude, the writing. Powerful.
I love the reality that small children and life don’t stop for any moment. It is reality.
Crayon Wrangler says
What I like here the most is the “YOU” that I have already seen in your writing. Your strength that you will keep moving forward with purpose, your focus on the little things around you and the bond of your family.
Beautiful writing and what a wonderful depiction of who you really are. I am so honored to know you and get to call you “friend”
So beautiful! I think it tells people what the most important things in your life are. Great writing.
Grace @ Arms Wide Open says
so wonderfully written and expressed… I have chills!
Pamela Gold says
It’s over the top, the things we do as mothers! My heart continues to break for you and your family. You’re so brave. So very brave.
Your writing always takes my breath away.
Love this! We walk too 🙂
Beautiful. You have a wonderful gift with words.
Lisa @ Two Bears Farm says
Beautiful story, and I love the picture!
I love it! You never seize to amaze me!
This is so beautifully written! You can feel the strength and optimism from the very first sentence. Great job!
Dani G says
if that’s your TRUE self, you’re one very beautiful self. xxoo