I was complaining about the dishes.
The sink is always full,
the dishwasher never empty
and those sippy cups?
What a pain they are to dismantle.
Tumbling cups and plastic bowls, they take up at least one shelf of every load.
Her face flashed a look of recognition as she remembered these days well.
Trying to shake her head in understanding, her eyes told so much more.
She missed this.
A bulging sink, running the dishwasher twice a day, dinner with someone teetering on her lap,
Piles of laundry waiting to be folded, someone tugging at her leg as she cooked.
Her days of my life were long gone,
At college or married with their own children.
Filling up her dinner table for the occasional meal and then heading home.
Her house quiet and her sink empty again.
My life looked perfect to her, as I shuffled through the drugstore long after I had wanted to sleep.
Unable to begin the next day without milk and juice and dish soap.
I stood a little taller in my yoga pants and barely made up face.
Hugging my purchases I walked to a minivan full of car seats and smiled as I backed away to the sound of toddler toons.
A sink full of dishes was awaiting my return.
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MamaTrack says
This is so true. We all think think our now is hard. But it’s also the envy of others. And why are those stupid straw cups as hard to clean as they are?
Jackie says
Beautifully written and exactly what I needed to hear today. Thank you!
Jessica says
So glad! Thanks so much for reading.
Kim says
So sweet. It’s true that our chaos is something others yearn for.
Came from TRDC.
PearlsGirl says
How lovely! My first time visiting your blog, but not my last. PearlsGirl
Ixy says
What a beautiful post (as was the last one of yours I read :)). Your writing is so poignant.
Penbleth says
This is so beautiful Jessica. I’m part way in between. One practically gone, two moe who won’t be long. I miss those days of sippy cups and long cuddles.
Katie says
Jessica, your writing makes me smile. It’s so lovely.
simple. beautiful. lovely.
Tonya says
A full sink = a full heart! This is a beautiful way to look at life. 🙂
Lauren Weber says
This post couldn’t come at a better time. Some days I feel overwhelmed, but you’re right…it’s like the county song by Trace Adkins “You’re gonna miss this.” Thank you for writing beautifully and putting things into perspective for all of us!
Theta Mom says
I saw this tweeted yesterday and had to come and read – I knew it would be awesome. And it was.
Beautiuflly written!!
Klz says
I already completely dread Alex moving out.
Nancy C says
Perfect. Just perfect.
I am in a whining-about-my-life slump, which is a joke because I know this will be the some of the best years of my life.
Jessica says
Me too! I’ve seen “me” in a few of your tweets lately. I’ve been really crabby and I know this conversation was meant to help me get out of my slump. Hope you feel better soon.
Practical Parenting says
This is a beautiful post. With my “baby” nearing 2 1/2, I feel my time with them slipping away. The never ending dishes are hard to like, but the little hands that created them are growing too fast!
Jessica says
I know exactly what you mean, my youngest is almost 2 and I’m trying to treasure the moments in between the craziness of it all!
Nana says
When I got to the “her days of my life were long gone”, I thought you were writing about me, and the way I look at you. I am envious of your mommy moments, and how you are the world to your kids, and yes, yes, yes I miss those days. But then I get my “nana” moments and I get a glimpse, and I remember and I enjoy my new role.
Stephanie says
This is such a great post and wonderful reminder that life moves on and nothing lasts forever. But I still would love it if my kitchen would stay clean for more than five minutes occasionally 🙂
Jessica says
Me too! If only someone would do it for us…
kp says
You have a dishwasher? Jealous! Haha. Great writing =)
Katrina says
Like I said when I asked you to guest post on my blog I meant what I said “You are a writer Jessica, one with grace, compassion, talent, love, experience, joy, pain, and stories to share.” I am blessed just to have met your (well, technically we haven’t met) but I feel like I get to know you a little better each day because of the magnificent words you put on your blog. Thanks!
Jessica says
Thank you so much for such a wonderful comment!
Kate says
Way better than a dishwasher!
And I just got my dishwasher back after it breaking in FEBRUARY! I LOVE having it back!
The Flying Chalupa says
I must, must, MUST keep telling myself that these are the good days. So hard to enjoy it in the moment! I must confess though, a quiet house sounds really nice. Wait. I never said that.
Lovely post, as usual.
Jessica says
I’ll pretend you didn’t say it and pretend that I don’t agree, especially since I wrote the post. 🙂
Shell says
Such great perspective!
Melissa says
Ahh…well yes, this puts it all in perspective. Beautifully written and you capture those details so well. XO
Jessica says
Thanks so much Melissa.
Elena says
This is so true. When we were picking some groceries up the other day at the market, I sighed to the lady working the deli when Lanagan wasn’t listening. She looked at me and said I know it seems hard now, but my kids are both gone and on their own and you will miss this time. I need to remember this more. It’s all tough, but so very worth it and something we will one day miss desperately.
Jessica says
Totally agree, it is tough to do in the stressful moments but one of these days we won’t remember the stress.
Tayarra says
I love this. I often think, if I could freeze time I think I would want that time period to be now. With all the busy, messy, whining times I still feel like I am having the time of my life. I know I’m going to miss it terribly and that’s what keeps me in the moment most of the time!
Kate F. says
What a great and insightful post… It reminds me of another excellent article that I just read from the Cleveland Plain Dealer Newspaper entitled: Motherhood means letting go breath by breath – By Regina Brett. Here is the link to the article. http://tinyurl.com/3k53pw2
Time and change are such hard things to deal with… and something that effects everyone. Wonderful Post Jessica.
Ryan (The Woven Moments) says
What a beautiful post. Mother’s Day is so much more magical now that I’m a mom and “get” my mom better. The interweaving of generations makes it so much more special!
By Word Of Mouth Musings says
Yes, several times this week I have wanted to have time stand still.
With my girls at 9 and 13, they are a pleasure and so fun … independent, but not too much.
Ack, what am I saying, not just this week, always, I always seem to want to stop it and keep them here 😉
Leighann says
OH the things we take for granted.
and now I’m anxious about getting older.
I don’t want an empty sink.
Amanda says
I need this perspective today, since last night I had to hold my baby while he slept…while I would have rather been in my own bed!!
Allison Killins says
I am guilty of doing this myself. Of seeing someone else’s life as better, more free, than my own. Thank you for reminding us to enjoy each season of our lives. I know I’ve rolled my eyes when someone says “the time goes so fast, enjoy every moment.” Sometimes it is hard to see it when you’re up to your eyeballs in snot, poop, crunched up cheerios, dirty dishes and other day-to-day minutia, but even looking back 6 years, I wonder where the time went. That is one of the unsolved mysteries of life.
Thank you for showing us the value of contentment and living in the now, dirty dishes and all.
Brittany {Mommy Words} says
This was beautiful and there is so much that I will miss and that I will always remember. The laundry in particular as I fold all the little things I love.
But never the dishes. They haunt me. There are so many and they scare me.
Amanda says
It really is so arduous, but the underbelly glistens with gifts.
Beautifully etched reminder.
Scary Mommy says
Loved this. I shall ignore my full sink one day longer for her.
Miss Marina Star says
Thank you for such a beautiful wonderful reminder of how fleeting these days are. My sink is full of dishes right now and I’m feeling nostalgic rather than resentful about it.
Lori says
This makes me want to go home and hug my full sink! Better yet, I’m going to hug the people who keep it full!!! Thaks for this post!
Sarah says
Beautiful. What a wonderful post.
Heather says
I will tryto remember this later today when I am foldilng the never ending pile of laundry!!
molly says
Awwww, what a beautiful reminder to appreciate your life NOW, just as it is. Someday we’ll realize that the small stuff WAS the big stuff 🙂
Paulette says
Amazingly beautiful!
Sherri says
Oh, this is so true….so very true.
When you’re so wrapped up in sippy cups and dirty dishes, you can’t imagine that one day you’ll miss it. And I am on the cusp of losing 50% of my dirty dishes and socks on the floor to a college dorm room two hours away.
And I can tell you, I miss them already. Beautiful post, Jessica….as always.
Wiley says
Love this one.
Leigh Ann says
I’m melting reading this. Wonderful reminder that it will all be gone too soon.
Jessica says
I know, we need to find a way to slow it down but also make it just a bit easier to sit back and watch it all.
Jessica Gardner says
I loved this post!!!! I try to remind myself all the time of this!!! I love your reading!
Jessica says
Thanks Jessica!
Jessica Gardner says
I guess I meant – I love you your writing 🙂
Barbara says
I love this! You have such an amazing way with words!
Jessica says
Thanks so much Barbara.
Sue the Desperate Housemommy says
True story: I was just having these types of wistful thoughts on Mother’s Day. Sure, I love my cherubs…at 10, 10, and 7, they’re loads of fun…but oh, what I wouldn’t give for a taste of “the good ol’ days.” Just a tiny dose, mind you.
Jessica says
Any time you need a tiny dose you can stop by my house. I’m sure you remember how amazing it is to have an extra set of hands show up. 🙂
Victoria KP says
Last night I had to “shuffle” to the grocery store when I was much too tired because my littlest one was sent home sick from school as I was on my way to run some much-needed errands. I would have had a little more spring in my step if I had read this first :-). Thanks!
Jessica says
Those late night trips are always so tough but this one definitely made me count my blessings.
Krista says
SIGH. This is such a great way to look at it. Why is it that I can read this, know how true it is, make a mental note to just “stop” sometimes and still when I get home tonight I will glare at the dishes, push the laundry around and shut cabinet doors a little too hard in a rush to make the house look presentable again before I go to bed and do it all over again tomorrow?
Jessica says
I know exactly what you mean. I try to refocus and appreciate the little things but there are so many times I get overwhelmed by all there is to do and don’t enjoy things the way I should.
Galit Breen says
This is so very lovely. I literally have chills and don’t seem to mind the full sink or over-flowing laundry basket quite as much. Thank you, my friend, so very much. XO
Jessica says
I’m glad you are feeling a bit better about the never ending “to do” list that we all seem to have. Thanks so much for reading, Galit.
Nicole @MTDLBlog says
Oh my…this brought tears to my eyes! Such a great way to bring it all back into perspective. We really need to value this time in our lives because it will pass us by before we know it. LOVE this!
Jessica says
Very true, my youngest is nearing two and I am already wishing he was a baby again. Who needs to shoe shop without a stroller in tow?
tracy says
Your writing is truly amazing my friend. I love this. (also jealous of the minivan)
Jessica says
So funny, I thought of you when I wrote the minivan line. You can ride in it anytime, as long as you don’t a crushed Cheerio or ten (million).