As my little men go from toddling babies to running-full-speed-ahead boys the reality of life is sinking in.
I have always been a girly girl and having two boys is like a boot camp introduction into life on the other side of the tracks.
So for all of you moms of boys out there I have a few questions:
- Why is it more fun to crash your bike into inanimate objects than ride it?
- Does dirt contain a magnetic forcefield?
- Why not just pee IN the toilet?
- What is so constricting about underwear?
- Is there also a magnetic forcefield to their boy parts?
- Any tips on breaking this forcefield while in public?
- Why are burps and farts more entertaining than a Disneyworld ride?
- What is so fun about headlocks/bodyslams/sitting on people?
- Why would anyone want to see semi-chewed up food?
- Will we ever follow my directions for craft projects?
- Is there anything more exciting than ding dongs/pee pees/weenies/whatever-they-have-decided-to-call-them-todays?
- How do they almost hit their heads with the toilet seat every. single. time?
- Are they born with talents such as straw wrapper-blowing, gate climbing, crib jumping and couch diving?
- And… why didn’t anyone tell me how fiercely little boys love their Mommies? How much my heart would stretch and grow? That I could hug someone who smells like a wet puppy and never, for a second, want to loosen my hold?
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