Since several of my frequent readers are completely out of kleenex, I decided I would attempt to lighten things up a bit around here.
The other day, as I was telling a Proud Mom story of how I bribe my children with cake pops, someone interrupted my shining moment by asking:
Do you know how many calories are in one of those?
And this began a long dialogue (in my head of course, the best conversations happen there) of first, promising myself I would avoid this woman for the rest of my cake pop-eating bribery days and second, thinking of all of the questions we ask but never really want the answers to.
Here are just a few that I talked to myself about:
-Should I exercise in the morning?
-What’s that smell?
-What are you guys doing up there?
-Why is it so quiet?
-Why is the chair/floor/bed/toilet seat wet?
-Did anyone just see that?
-What happened to my boobs?
-Does this make my butt look big?
-Should I buy this purse/sweater/pair of boots that cost more than preschool tuition?
And then there are those questions that, if you have to ask, the answer is most likely “no”:
-Did you brush your teeth today?
-Am I wearing deodorant?
-Honey, did you remember to get milk/bread/eggs/tampons/anything that would prevent me from dragging all of our children into a grocery store tomorrow?
-Can’t we all just take a nap/sit still/wait patiently as Mommy blogs?
And my personal favorite…
-Is ANYONE listening to me? Anyone? Anyone?
What questions do you ask but not want an answer to?
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