Dear Susie Lou*,
I think it is time we go our separate ways.
We’ve been seeing each other for years and sadly, things just aren’t the same. Actually they are the same, the same as they were 10 weeks ago and 10 weeks before that. I have pleaded with you to lighten things up but you just give me the same old routine.
Strangely, you change your own ways every time I walk in the door while I tend to resemble my high school graduation picture.
Our conversations are nice enough but I like to come up for air between topics and a better head massage wouldn’t hurt either. Oh and your latest look? It scares me. I’m sure it is of such high fashion that I can’t reach it, but I am a less-is-more, go-big-and-you-should-stay-home kind of girl.
Even though you are centrally located and surrounded by windows you can count on me to avoid you at all costs. This has made it difficult to dine, shop and take my children to school but well worth the sacrifice. And seeing one of your coworkers? I. Would. Never.
A brazilian wax sounds more pleasant than a conversation over why I’m leaving, so please don’t call.
My next cut, highlight and arch are on the other side of town.
We are looking at homes two cities over just in case this one does not work out.
Terrified of Hairdresser Confrontation*
so no one can find her and tell her about this letter to protect the innocent
Have you ever been afraid to break up with a hairdresser/ babysitter/ housecleaner/ etc.?
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