About a month or so after we got married, Mark and I went out to dinner with friends who were married a few years before us. When dinner was over we headed to the car hand in hand and I asked Mark if he had noticed that they never held hands.
I never want that to be us, I told him. I was head-over-heals in love and wanted him to hold my hand every moment it was empty for the rest of our lives.
That was over seven years ago and I think we held hands once this month, or maybe just our palms touched as we passed kids from one to the other.
But today, and everyday, I love him just as much as I did that day in the car.
I love him the same and different and more.
Because when I do the laundry I find hair bows and pacifiers in pockets where golf tees used to be,
because he can turn “Every Rose Has Its Thorn” into a mean lullaby,
because his idea of a crazy Saturday night is laughing together as our kids streak through the house, pajamas flying.
And because I have learned, there is a lot more to marriage than holding hands and gazing into each others eyes.
There is laughter and tears and laundry and grocery shopping and more-than-full-time jobs and sick kids at night and sleeping with little elbows in your ribs and more moments of wonderful and heartbreaking than I can count, and it is all worth it.
Because there is someone at your side through it all, whether they can reach your hand or not.
Some day we will have empty hands to hold and I will find golf tees where hair bows once were and “Every Rose Has Its Thorn” will be reclaimed by its rightful owner and, I would imagine, there won’t be quite as much streaking on our Saturday nights, but I will love my husband the same and different and more,
all over again.
Happy Father’s Day to my amazing husband, my wonderful dad and to the many dedicated dads out there.
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I remember thinking the very same thing when my husband and I first started dating and now we are busy, just like you.
This is a beautiful reminder that things change, but for the better. They grow, but we grow closer.
You always do such a great job putting things in perspective.
I keep on going back to the post and I just have to leave a comment: This brings tears and a smile on my face. Beautiful words!
Thank you so much Aimee, I’m glad it made you smile.
So sweet. I hope Mark and your dad had a very happy Father’s Day. xo
We had a great day, hope you guys did too.
Love every single word of this!
I can sooo relate to this post! Thank you for sharing. Your perspective is right on!
I’m visiting via the Honest Voices group.
I remember being those starry-eyed “kids” and feeling sorry for the older couples who were quiet or unaffectionate. I also love how the love grows more than I thought possible after kids. This is so beautiful.
I can certainly relate to this. You made me think of when Tim and I did all of the marriage prep that the Catholic church requires, including meetings with a sponsor couple. They were a busy family with 2 kids of about middle school age at the time, and there was always hustle and bustle around our meetings in the evenings. Tim and I were all starry-eyed and wondering if our lives would someday be like that and guess what?! They are! 😉 xoxo
That was beautiful, Jessica. A lovely ode to your husband. 🙂
I don’t think I’ve ever read a post of yours without crying.
This was perfect. I’m sending it to my husband. (We still hold hands a lot, though! Mainly because I am a giant mushface and he works so much that when he’s around I like to be attached.)
Oh I’m so sorry for the tears. I’ll send you a tissue warning next time :). Love that you and your husband still hold hands. We do on date nights, which aren’t often.
What a perfect piece about a true, loving partnership. My favorite Father’s Day piece I’ve read. Beautiful (as usual).
Aww, thank you so much.
Such a beautiful and loving tribute to marriage, devotion and an amazing man!!! Yes yes yes… I completely agree when it comes to mine. 🙂
Absolutely beautiful and heartwarming. And absolutely true!