Because you are my youngest I am writing your birthday post two days after it passed.
I’ve exchanged filling in your baby book for keeping your brother from scaling the television while you teethed on my shoulder and your sisters cried on the floor.
Your pacifiers were cleaned off on the thigh of my jeans and “candy” was your second word.
Because you are my youngest I slid you in our bed when it made nights easier and I hugged your crib before we took it down.
You walked when you wanted to and talked when you wanted to and I didn’t consult a single chart or book.
I’ve let you be picky with your food and insistent on your clothes and stepped over you when it was a meltdown you needed to cry out.
Because you are my youngest you’ve stayed up way too late and used a toddler bed for two days of your toddlerhood.
You run to keep up with your siblings and I waver between cheering you on and squeezing you into a baby sling.
We skipped the baby signing videos for Dora and took the fast track to baseball, soccer and couch-jumping.
But because you are my youngest, when you wake up in the morning I carry you for a bit.
Your long legs dangle and your head balances on my shoulder and I rub the baby hairs at your neck.
Sometimes we should be in a hurry and sometimes I need both arms.
But I know this time, how quickly I will put you down to join the others, how easily you will slip into your own space, forgetting my hand is there to hold and saying goodbye without turning your head back.
So I will be right here waiting to let you be little whenever you don’t want to be big
because you are my youngest.
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Love! And it’s so so true – every word and everything we do to stretch it out AND let ourselves know it’s okay to let go a little. They both go hand-in-hand.
Heartbreakingly sweet.
Gorgeous!
My baby is turning one tomorrow. I’m so sad 🙁 🙁 thanks for the tears! 🙁 🙁 in a good way!
Oh boy, such a big day. Happy birthday to your little guy.
Every time I come to your blog, I read a post that I love. Every single time. This is a beautiful post that so perfectly captures that connection we moms have with our babies. My youngest is still only one-and-a-half, but I absolutely related to what you’ve said here. Thank you.
Thank you so much for such an amazing compliment. You made my day!
Tears in my eyes… Perfectly written.
My youngest is turning 5 in just days. I still don’t understand how he grew up so fast. Soon the day will come that he’s been anticipating for years and he’ll get on that yellow school bus with his big brothers… and I’ll be standing there watching… alone.
And five seems so old doesn’t it? I felt like I still had “little ones” until now. Sniff, sniff.
This is just perfect, although it makes me a bit teary-eyed that I did not know that my youngest would be my last.
My sweet baby girl. I would have savored the moments more.
Maybe.
Or perhaps I would have done exactly what I did do, which is get through it all one day at a time. The ups and downs and highs and lows and love. love. love.
Either way, I’m wishing so much joy to you all and hope the celebration was wonderful.
Happy Birthday, Sawyer.
You are the youngest and uniquely special.
Always.
XOXO
He’s working hard and making sure he gets all the special things for his birthday. I think we’ve been celebrating for at least a week.
xo
Great post and photo.
Such beautiful words. I am still at the beginning of this journey (my first is just turning two) and I relish reading the words of more experienced moms. I find it fascinating the things that we learn to let go of (like the need to read every single parenting book) and the things that we grasp a little more tightly (those moments when they still want to be little). Thank you for writing this. I’m visiting from the Honest Mom linkup!
Thanks for visiting Katie. My perspective has definitely changed as my kids have gotten older. I used to wish away certain phases but now that I’ve seen how quickly they go I’m okay with them lasting a little longer.
Aww! My youngest of two is turning two on Friday. I feel like sobbing sometimes, but his sister’s preschool graduation is the same day so I’m feeling a lot of push and pull and deep affection for both. It’s tough. And awesome.
Happy Birthday to your beautiful youngest.
Really happy I got a chance to meet you this weekend. It was hectic but I wanted to say hi.
Oh my gosh that’s tough. I never realized that a close-to-summer birthday could be so emotional. Every year I’m trying to balance my youngest turning another year older with the moving on to older grades of my other kids. So much to process. Happy Birthday to your little one!
Awwww…my oldest and your youngest were born on the same day. I, too, am struggling with this birthday. He is suddenly a big boy and doesn’t want me so much anymore. Thankfully, he has a little brother who will still snuggle occasionally. He’s never needed me as much as big brother, though. [sniff] Happy birthday to your little guy (and you, too, mama)!
Two birthdays on the same day? That is too much to process! Thanks for your kind words.
oh so beautiful… perfectly put and not a dry eye left here.
Aww, thank you!
Beautifully written. Lovely tribute to your baby boy!
Oh, my heart. This is so true and beautiful. Now that I’ve met you, I read in your voice and love your writing even more. Perfect, absolutely perfect.
Aww, thank you so much. I’m going through Courtney withdrawal over here. So glad we had time to talk but it wasn’t enough!!