Life after loss with autism, preemies and a rainbow baby
I had plans to write an inspirational post today, about how the pain of loss gets better as time goes on and putting one foot in front of the other becomes something you don’t have to talk yourself through, but since Friday my world has been rocked to the core like everyone else’s. I need […]
When you lose balance, the body’s natural reaction is to take a step forward to stay upright or put your hands out to catch yourself or just to remember to get back up again. I tend to do none of these. While I’m falling, I turn inwards to think about it, wondering what made me […]
The end of October is much easier than the beginning. The funny thing about grief and anniversaries is the days and weeks leading up to them are so much worse than the actual days themselves. My life exhales after we pass these dates each year and our world goes on again, different, as it always […]
We held a lantern release Sunday, the evening before Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Day. I had visions of the evening, of resting my head on my husband’s shoulder and crying as we watched our lantern float to the sky, finishing our week of birthdays and anniversaries with one last send off to our baby […]
I have been searching for ways to find one activity that meets the learning needs of all my kids. I know motherhood comes with a multitasking requirement but my mind sort of starts spinning when someone is saying “how do you spell happy?” while someone else is asking me to draw a circle and someone […]
Five years ago today was the worst day of my life. As much as I would like to crawl back in time and change the before, shift the outcome, continue the whirlwind of caring for three babies at once, never hear the sounds of my husband’s grief or answer the most heartbreaking of questions from my […]
In the past week I have forgotten deadlines, appointments, preschool homework, what day it is and my place on the other side of a conversation. I have tried, I am trying, to be here. I have written words to remind myself about luck and love and tucking away memories and I have gotten out of […]
I lost my daughter six years ago. One of triplets, she passed away while still in the NICU. I am often asked by moms new to this process how I felt in those early days and months after saying goodbye to her. My first response would be to say I felt like I had been […]
We are tiptoeing towards five years since we lost Hadley or maybe I am stomping. I imagine if you were to brush up against me you would feel the bristle of my moods. As much as I want to be fluffy clouds and light, I am sandpaper and raw edges. I sit at the table […]
